So Apparently my list of 101 Mingle Tips has not solved all of the dating and social skills problems in the world. There are still a lot of lonely, poorly mannered, and socially uncomfortable people out there. So here I am. Back with more tips for you. (*New info in blue italics)
I have decided to give updates and new information on each of my original 101 Tips For Social Success With Class.
You can find the updates in blue italics at the end of the original post at the bottom of this page. Happy mingling!
Once your mingling skills reach a certain level, I should warn you that other guys may begin to get jealous. This is inevitable. And when men get jealous or feel threatened, they may make things uncomfortable for you. You should be prepared to deal with these situations in a civilized way.
Even if you are only interested in general social mingling and have no intention of trying to get dates, other guys will quickly feel threatened by you. Your social comfort alone can cause this to happen (especially if you follow the advice given in this blog!). This brings me to today's tip:
MINGLE TIP #6: MEN: KNOW HOW TO HANDLE JEALOUS GUYS WITH CLASS
Here are some thoughts:
(1) One reason that guys get jealous of another guy with good social skills is that they realize that they don't measure up. Jealousy is an ugly thing. They may feel like you are a threat to steal their girlfriend, or even their girl "friend." This is natural. Being prepared for it ahead of time will help you to handle it much better.
(2) Guys who feel threatened will often try to show that they are tough or cool by giving you grief. When this happens, I have a few tips for handling the situation (Try these at your own risk. There are some crazy people out there that won't be slowed down by anything you do, of course):
*Keep calm. I can't stress this enough. The more emotional another person gets with you, the more calm you should be. This is not always easy to do, but make it your goal. Nothing makes unstable people look worse than another other person being calm when they aren't.
*Don't trade insults. This will only escalate the situation and make things worse. No matter how good or true your insults may be, this is a losing battle.
*Use humor: Don't be a clown, but sometimes joking can calm an ugly situation.
*Laugh at them. Be very careful with this one, but let them know that you don't take them seriously. Even the thought of fighting or getting into an argument with them is funny to you.
*Ignore them. Another one to be careful with. Don't laugh. Don't smile. No reaction. They aren't worth your attention.
*Change location. I'm not suggesting running away from trouble, but changing location is sometimes the best solution to potential conflict.
(3) Getting some static from jealous/threatened guys is likely going to happen. That's the price you pay for being a good mingler. Be ready for it.
UPDATE: (4) Don't be a jealous guy yourself. Jealousy is a waste of energy. Not only does it show that you don't trust the person you are with, but it also makes you look bad. Have enough confidence in yourself to believe that no other guy could beat you out, and at the same time don't worry about it happening. If a woman wants to be with someone else, so be it. Remember, you aren't trying to win her over, you are just looking for a great connection.
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