It seems like people have been wondering about appropriate age difference for couples since the beginning of time. People often have dramatically different opinions about this issue. This brings me to my tip for today:
MINGLE TIP #39: DON'T WORRY ABOUT AGE DIFFERENCE WHEN DATING
Everyone has heard of celebrity couples having a large (and sometimes huge) age difference between them. Bruce Willis, Chuck Norris, Andy Griffith, and Jerry Seinfeld are (or were) all with someone more than twenty years younger. Dick Van Dyke, Cary Grant, and Fred Astaire were all with someone more than forty years younger. But do you have to be a celebrity for a large age difference to be acceptable?
Here are some thoughts:
(1) People like what they like. I have met people who were twenty-two years old and thought that a twenty-five year old was too old to date. I also once met a twenty year old who was dating a fifty year old and had no problem with it. People like different things. Don't apologize for your preferences.
(2) Don't try to force your own opinion about age difference on someone else. Okay, so you think that dating someone someone with a large age gap is outrageous. You have a right to think that way. Just don't try to shame someone who might disagree with you into thinking that the idea should be automatically wrong for everyone.
(3) You don't have to be a rich, famous, celebrity to pull off a large age difference. So what do you need, then? A good connection and both people being willing to get over the age gap. Period.
(4) Be ready to face resistance from family, friends, and society in general if the age difference is large enough. We have all heard the rule about not dating anyone younger than half your age plus seven right? Boooooooo. Forget that. Do what works for you. Who cares what other people think. Now, if the other person is still living at home, then it might be difficult to go against parents wishes to not date you. If the person you want to date is an adult and on their own, however, then you don't have to worry as much about parental objection. It's good to be respectful of parents opinions, don't get me wrong. Once you are an adult, though, parents shouldn't have the same power to make you do or not do things anymore.
(5) Don't imagine how old you were when the other person was born, or what the ages will be when one of you gets old. Who cares? If neither person cares about these things, then don't let someone try to talk you into thinking they are important. If either thought bothers you, then don't be the type who dates much older people. Simple.
So, the lesson here is to figure out what you like, and don't let people talk you out of it. If you prefer to be with someone close to your age, then stick to that. And, if you prefer (or don't mind) dating people who are much younger or older than you, don't shy away from that just because you are worried about what others might think. Do what makes you happy.
Note: If you are the type who might like dating people who have a large age difference, I do suggest that you try to be very careful and respectful when first meeting potential dates. Don't get too pushy if they seem uncomfortable or if they make it clear that the age difference bothers them. Reading the vibe with the other person is an extremely important goal in these situations.
UPDATE: (6) Be casual and take things slowly at first. Some people may not like the idea of dating someone with a large age difference until they meet the right person. This is why it is probably not a good idea to get too flirty or bold at first in this situation. Give them a chance to get to know you first, and vice versa before you make your move. Be casual and take things slowly and you will have a much better chance than going over the top and direct at first.
*Follow me on Twitter @TheMingleMaster
***Don't miss a post. Get free email updates below.
AS FEATURED ON: