So Apparently my list of 101 Mingle Tips has not solved all of the dating and social skills problems in the world. There are still a lot of lonely, poorly mannered, and socially uncomfortable people out there. So here I am. Back with more tips for you, as I update my original posts. New information is below the original post.
Dating online has become very popular these days. I recently heard a statistic that one in every four couples are now meeting on the net. But, is this the best way to find somebody? This brings me to my tip for today:
MINGLE TIP #32: AVOID INTERNET DATING
I am not saying that you are crazy or stupid if you like meeting people online. There have been plenty of happy couples that got together this way. So feel free to disagree. I have a few reasons why I am not a fan of it, however:
(1) There is no cool meeting story. If this is the only thing holding you back from online dating, then you are probably being too picky. Everyone can't have a great "how we met" story. But it sure is cool if you do.
(2) There is no vibe to read. If you follow my posts regularly, you know that I am a big fan of reading the vibe and connection before committing to spend much time with someone. There is no vibe to read, though, when you are meeting online. You may say that you can evaluate the connection once you get to know someone first from a distance, but that seems like a lot of vibeless work to be doing!
(3) Compatibility is more than just matching lists of likes, dislikes, goals, and hobbies. It would be nice if you could just line those things up and have the perfect match. In reality, though, it doesn't work this way. I like to think there is a little magic that goes into a good connection. Just because you both like playing tennis, bungee jumping, and shopping at Whole Foods, doesn't mean that you are perfect for each other.
(4) Finding a match shouldn't be like ordering at Burger King. There is something strange to me about picking and choosing your future mate based on a list of characteristics. But, if you absolutely must do the online dating thing, I would at least suggest doing it on a site where they do the matching for you. Going through a list of pictures and picking and choosing is a meat market if there ever was one.
(5) It is too easy to be dishonest online. I know, people can lie in person too. But the temptation is much greater online when you can say whatever you want to say about yourself before you even meet.
(6) Online dating lowers motivation to get out of the house. In the old days, if you didn't want to be alone, you had to figure out a way to get out and socialize. Now, you can just sit at home and get on the computer. The boom in online dating is weakening social skills on a worldwide scale.
If you disagree with me and think you might like to try the online dating scene, then ask yourself--why is that when people get connected online they always seem to lie about how they met? So, if you are feeling tempted to get into the online dating world, I say PUT THE MOUSE DOWN. Get out and talk to people. Learn how to mingle with class in person!
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