So Apparently my list of 101 Mingle Tips has not solved all of the dating and social skills problems in the world. There are still a lot of lonely, poorly mannered, and socially uncomfortable people out there. So here I am. Back with more tips for you. (*New info in blue italics)
I have decided to give updates and new information on each of my original 101 Tips For Social Success With Class.
You can find the updates in blue italics at the end of the original post at the bottom of this page. Happy mingling!
I know people who refuse go out in public unless they have other people with them. They are afraid that it might look bad to be seen alone. This is a big mistake, and also not good for our social skills. This brings me to my tip for today:
MINGLE TIP #33: DON'T BE AFRAID TO GO OUT SOLO
Like I mentioned in an earlier post (Mingle Tip #31: Volunteer At A Retirement Home), I always try to have a "seize the day" kind of attitude. We only live once, and we only have so much time. Since that is the case, there is no way that I am going to sit at home when I when I would rather be out just because I am afraid of how it would look. Shooooooot. I don't think so. Here are some thoughts:
(1) Go out solo during the daytime. If you aren't used to going out by yourself, then try it out in a casual type of place, during the day. Go out to lunch, coffee, or something like that to get used to being on your own. Lunchtime and dinnertime are great times to find civilized people out and about.
(2) Bring something with you to read. This can not only keep you from getting bored, but it can also be something that can spark a conversation with a stranger.
(3) Dress like you are ready to mingle. You don't have to dress like you are going to the prom every time you go out, but at least try to look decent. You never know when you might run into someone interesting to talk to.
(4) Talk to people everywhere! Talk to people every chance you get. Don't just wait for someone who looks datable before you start talking. Talk to everyone you can. Get in the habit of breaking the conversation barrier as much as possible.
(5) Let being alone motivate you. If you find that you hate going out solo, then guess what--you should do something about it! Get out and mingle and line up some people for the next time you feel like going out if you don't want to be alone.
Whatever you do, don't let discomfort with going out alone get in the way of your social life. Be willing to go out wherever you want, whenever you want. Don't limit yourself to only going out in groups, and don't feel like you have to wait until you have company before you go anywhere.
Note: I know that some people may be afraid to go out alone for your safety reasons. If that is the case, or if you live in a rough area, don't let this stop you! Just be smart about the types of places that you choose to go to. Let's not be so afraid for our safety that we just lock ourselves in our rooms and never go out unless we are accompanied by ten friends or a body guard.
UPDATE: (6) Don't worry about what other people think about you. A lot of times, people are embarrassed to go out solo because they think it will make them look bad. Ugh. Worrying about how you look to others is one of the hardest obstacles to overcome if you want to be a master of social skills. It is also one of the most important. Sometimes people use this advice as an excuse to do whatever they want and not worry about acting with character or class. That is not the point. You can still be a quality person and not be concerned about being embarrassed. The best approach is to be who you are, do what you do, and not worry about what other people are thinking. They can approve of you or not. That is not really your problem.
*Follow me on Twitter @TheMingleMaster
***Don't miss a post. Get free email updates below.
AS FEATURED ON: